Correlate

There's a piece in the media Guardian today saying that there's no correlation between a newspaper's online circulation and any falls in it's print readership. It's fairly interesting and a bit surprising, but not as surprising as finding out that The Daily Mail's online readership is growing by 60% a year.

I truly don't understand. I can imagine the 2m Mail readers pouring over it's racist cancer scare stories and wiping the ink from their fingers on the face of a passing
immigrant child. What I don't expect them to do is be surfing away and choosing the Daily Mail when they could looking for porn footage of someone in a Winston Churchill mask buggering someone dressed up as Jacques Delors.

In short I have a default expectation of Internet users to be young trendy liberal types. In other news Narnia is real and the Government truly believes in fairness. Yup, I'm as naive as a Disney character.

It's not like there's a single sane person commenting at the bottom of BBC articles. These angry drooling maniacs have clearly found a perfect bosom to nestle in with Mail Online. If we could hack into it and, at a peak traffic moment, transmit a deadly ray that pierces their living brains and turns them into smoking husks we might just make the world a better place. Though mass murder probably causes cancer, so I'd better not.