Line

17 May 2010

I have crossed the line from functioning existence into some kind of sleepwalking state where simple things like raising a sarcastic eyebrow are just tooo much effort. It's debilitating. I can barely raise a tirade of abuse about the Queen's Speech or point and laugh at Teresa May.

What can I do?

This morning I was viciously assaulted by a selection of alarms. While the Ducks of Death on my iPod quacked furiously at me, my Nokia phone played a merrily insufferable tune and my computer boomed its auto-start-up noise.

It didn't make any difference. I just lay there, listening to it bleep my brain to a pulp. And lo, just when I think I've got enough energy to crawl to work, I can't get into the bathroom.

It's all too much. Someone throw me a line, will they?