Clam

9 April 2010

Random words still down, so this is still courtesy of nutmeg.

There's an embarassing moment in what is otherwise one of the best of the "classic" Dr Who serials, Genesis of the Daleks. The Doctor and his companions are wandering around in a subterranean monster cave for reasons known only to the author when they find genetically altered clams. These appear to be quite harmless since although they open their clammy mouths and shut them again, they can't actually move. They're clams. If they've been genetically modified to skip like happy children it is not apparent from the special effects team's efforts, whcih pretty much go down the route of traditional clam.

"I don't like the fuckin' modernist clams. I call a clam a clam and like it to act like one. A real clam. Fuckin' old school. That's how it's going to be, clamwise."

So when Harry or whoever it is gets his leg stuck in one, the viewer is left to wonder why the dip-shit dangled his ankle in a giant clam's mouth. Was it a dare?

But there are people who would. You just know it. A massively dangerous creature with jaws like a vice is just sitting there. It can't touch you unless you go and play footsie with it. Oh, go one then. Just a toe or two.

Snap.

There's probably a big fat analogy in there somewhere. I won't go there today. It might bite me.